So I was enlightened a little bit the other morning -
we had the kind of morning where things were not going according to schedule, and it ended up with Tim heading off to school with no belt (a dress code violation for which he received three days of no recess - dumb if you ask me), a very wrinkled, just out of the dryer oxford shirt and wet, unbrushed hair. He may or may not have brushed his teeth - i forgot to check!
after i got him dropped off, i came back to realize that it was picture day!
so I quickly brushed my own teeth, changed out of my p.j's and headed back to school, armed with a brush and hair gel - could never find the belt - we have since bought two more so that we can avoid ''ridiculous recess restriction'' in the future
As I was heading into the school, a little girl was also running in - she was probably about 7 years old. Cute as a button too! She got about half way to the door and realized that she was going to be tardy.
She stopped dead in her tracks and went into full panic mode. She had clearly never been tardy before.
As she walked back to her mom's car for advice, her mother starts SCREAMING at her to go inside. She continued screaming at the top of her lungs - cussing at her, calling her stupid, etc.
I was outraged - I am SO not confrontational, but I couldn't let it go.
I walked over and asked her to stop yelling at her kid - when she ignored me (or didn't hear me over her own screeching voice) I matched her tone and insisted that she get a hold of herself and treat her child with a little more respect.
I then helped the cutie inside, and trying to ignore her tears, in my most cheery voice, assured her that it was going to be ok - i just knew it! After she left the office with her tardy slip, I reported the incident to the office ladies. They were completely unaffected. Just acted like I was upset about the sky being blue!
I was kind of perplexed - I went home thinking about that girl and how her mom made her feel - what a terrible woman she is.
Then I realized that I am that mother.
I don't curse at Tim, but I do lose my patience. Especially in the mornings. I tried to remember if I had yelled at him to find his belt, or brush his hair, or put on an ironed shirt that very morning. Sad thing is - I can't remember - probably because my impatience with him is routine.
How can I look into these big beautiful eyes and make him feel however he must feel when I am yelling at him. I certainly don't like to be talked to in an ugly way - It makes me feel little.
I am going to try to remember that mean mom and myself, and our scary similarities everyday - every moment.
Tim is a good boy, a perfect person and he deserves my love and respect always. My mom NEVER yelled at me. Ever. That stands out to me when I think of her. I want that memory for Tim.
on a side note - this is his gross, cool blood blister. it's on his shin. notice his hairy little legs. these will be "man" legs before i know it!
he is growing up - his life is moving fast and i need to make sure to love everyday with him - no matter how much patience it takes.